Our little girl is at the age when she is picking up new words and ideas. I am starting this blogpost as an on-going record of the some of the darnest things that missus and I have the good fortune of hearing the little one say.
I will be keeping this as a live thread. Will add more entries as and when the little one comes up with more pearls of wisdom.
Wisdom?
Why compare? Missus and me were talking about how little one’s twin cousins who were around 6 weeks younger than her were quite advanced in their speech faculties. Little one asked innocently, “Why you compare?” It’s a good reminder to us not to do that and be more mindful about our remarks.
I did not wet my shirt… This one demonstrates the (intentional) power of positive framing. A few times, the little would wet herself when her diaper overloads. Instead of saying, “I wet myself…”, she would say, “I didn’t wet my shirt…” We can’t get upset with that….
Contentment… Missus was trying to dissuade the little girl from watching too much Peppa Pig on YouTube, by saying, “We all want a lot of things. I want to you get to bed early, be a good girl and many other things”. Little Miss’ comeback, “But I only want one thing: watch cartoon!”
Sound Logic?
It must be a small bird… One time, missus was telling the little one that we needed to keep the window closed to prevent birds from coming in. The sliding window was slightly opened. The little one said, “Must be a small bird…”
How did that get in there? Little girl was flipping through a book with an illustration consisting of anthropomorphic animals doing human things. One of it had them riding a bus. The little one asked innocently, “How did it [an elephant] get on the bus?”
Reasons for dodging medication. Little girl needed to put something into her ear to get her earwax out. Following is the sequence of argument:
a. She refused saying, “I’m scared”.
b. My wife offered to help. She said, “Your shoulder is sore from Yoga” — which was factual.
c. I offered to help. She said, “Your arm is sore” — which was factual as I had a vaccination done.
d. We offered to get her soft toy friends as proxy helpers. She said, “Bear bear is too small to help”, “Pillow has no hands”, etc.
It’s not raining heavily because I can hear the music… in our car when it’s raining lightly. She remembered times when it rained so heavily that the noise of raindrops made any music we played in the car inaudible.
Appropriate soap volume. One time the missus told the little one not to use too much soap because of her small size. Then she said, “Mama bigger so need more soap… Dadda very big need a lot of soap!”
I put myself to sleep… Missus and I said that the little one had never once put herself to sleep. Little one retorted, “I have. In the car!” Technically true as she has a tendency to fall asleep during car rides.
Out of box thinking?
A family of poop. When asked why her booger couldn’t be removed from her nostril.“My nose poo poo cannot come out. It on holiday with my poo poo and their daddy-mummy….”
Once upon a time, I sat down on a chair like a cat.
Master Negotiator…
I want to read a book… Little one wanted to play a game before sleeping. Missus said, “No, let’s read a book”. Little Missy said, “I want two books”. “No, one book…”, said Missus. Little miss brought the thickest book she could find….
Ask the Clueless Middle Age Dad 